October 8th, 2005


Cause it made me laugh

Why Men Shouldn't be Pastors:

1. Men are too emotional to be pastors. Their conduct at football, baseball and basketball games show this.
2. A man's place is in the army.
3. Some men are so handsome they will distract women worshipers.
4. Their physical build indicates that men are more suited to tasks such as chopping down trees and wrestling mountain lions. It would be “unnatural” for them to do other forms of work.
5. In the New Testament account, the person who betrayed Jesus was a man. Thus, his lack of faith and ensuing punishment stands as a symbol of the subordinate position that all men should take.
6. Men are overly prone to violence. No really manly man wants to settle disputes other than by fighting about it. Thus, men would be poor role models, as well as dangerously unstable in positions of leadership.
7. To be an ordained pastor is to nurture the congregation. But this is not a traditional male role. Rather, through history, women have been considered to be not only more skilled at nurturing, but also more attracted to it. This makes them the obvious choice for ordination to the pastorate.
8. Man was created before woman, obviously as a prototype. Thus, he represents an experiment, rather than the crowning achievement of Creation.
9. For men who have children, their pastoral duties might distract them form the responsibility of being a parent.
10. Men can still be involved in church activities, even without being ordained. They can sweep paths, repair the church roof and maybe even lead the singing on Father's Day. By confining themselves to such traditional male roles, they can still be vitally important to the life of the church.
11. Women will never respect a man dressed in the skirt of a liturgical robe.